Guardian Girl (The Chronicles of Staffordshire) Read online

  Lena elicited another moment of laughter from the conflicted woman. She always knew how to deflate Lenore’s fears.

  With his eyes still closed and his lips pressed to her ear, Rory picked up Lena’s logic. “Lenore… You didn’t seduce me.”

  Lenore attempted to turn her head away. With his powerful grip, Rory pushed her face back. She pulled a hand free and touched his cheek.

  “But how do you know, Rory? How do you know that I did not lure you into a trap. I am a horrible person! I am evil! I always use my body to seduce people! How do you know that I did not seduce you and trap you tonight? I touched you at the party and then you followed me home! I seduced you, Rory, and now you will be trapped!”

  …And then Rory took things a step too far.

  “Because, Lenore… I’m sorry to have to break this to you, but… You're just not that hot, babe.”

  Lena snorted. “Oh NO he didn’t!”

  Indignant, Lenore glared at Rory’s closed eyes. “Ex-CUSE ME? What did you just say, Rory St. Cloud?”

  “Well… I hope you won’t take this the wrong way, Lenore… but... you’re actually something of a… Well… a ‘hag,’ if I may be so bold.”

  Lena turned her head and smothered her face in the sofa, laughing hysterically, her body shaking violently. She peed a little.

  Hell hath no fury like a supermodel dissed. “A…? A…? Did you just call ME… Lenore Consuela Maria De La Fuente… A… A 'HAG’? A God damned fucking HAG?” Lenore demonstratively swept her hand across her body, ignoring the fact that Rory still had his eyes closed. “You call THIS… Lenore Consuela Maria De La Fuente... A FUCKING HAG?”

  “Well… If you must know the truth, Lenore… More like a wart-faced, humped-over, Quasimodo hag.”

  Lena guffawed into the seat back, tears streaming down her face. She pounded the couch back with her fist, crossing her legs to forestall a flood.

  “RORY ST. CLOUD! YOU LOOK AT ME!”

  Rory opened his eyes and broke a smile.

  “HAG? DID YOU CALL ME A HAG?”

  Lena couldn’t resist. “Actually, sweetie, I think the phrase he used was a, ‘Wart-faced, humped-over, Quasimodo hag,’ to be precise.”

  “Stay out of this, Malena! I will deal with you later!”

  “Yes, Ma’am!” Lena saluted and reclined into the couch.

  “Rory St. Cloud! You take that back!”

  “Take what back…? ‘Hag’.”

  Lenore smacked his thigh. “Stop calling me that, Rory St. Cloud!”

  “What? ‘Hag’? Sorry, dear. Sometimes the truth hurts. Have you ever taken a good look at yourself in the mirror, Lenore? Yeesh. 'Hag’.”

  “RORY!”

  “Yes…? Hag?”

  Lenore slugged him on the arm.

  “WOW! Not bad for a pathetic, doddering, hag.”

  Lenore slugged him on the chest. Harder.

  “OUCH! Hmmm… I seem to remember that fashion designer Raquel Shalamar losing her mind a few years ago and picking a total hag for her…”

  “ROOOORRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYY…!”

  In a fury, Lenore grabbed Lena by the legs and threw her over the back of the couch. She shoved Rory to the floor and jumped on the beefcake. Wrapping her legs tightly around his waist she crushed Rory with muscular thighs, his re-stiffening pole pressing firmly into her butt.

  “Rory St. Cloud, you take that back!”

  “Hmmm… My standards must be dropping. I guess I got myself seduced by a hideous, wart-faced hag.”

  POUND!

  “Ouch! Not bad… For a…”

  POUND! PUNCH! SLAP!

  “Wow! Lena, she can get mighty worked up for a…”

  GRAB! ROLL! PUNCH! CLAW! CRAAAASH!

  An indistinguishable pile of firewood, a perfectly good, half-full bottle of Sandeman ’66, and a smattering of still-edible dark chocolate squares sat in the approximate former location of what might have been a $1250 imported coffee table.

  YANK! LIFT! SLAM!

  One of the two end tables required Krazy Glue, a $600 antique bronze lamp would require a healthy soldering job.

  Lena climbed up and perched on the back of the couch as Rory and Lenore rolled, fought, kissed, groped, and slammed their way from here to there across the apartment. She considered breaking out the video camera, but decided against risking someone finding the tape and turning it over to Hard Copy.

  Lenore jumped on Rory’s back and wrapped her legs around his waist. She pounded his shoulders with her fists and screamed a string of indistinguishable Spanish obscenities into his ear. Rory staggered, the two lovers crashing into the dining room table. Lenore rolled across the table and fell off the other side, landing at full speed onto a $500 chair that self-sacrificially gave its life to protect Lenore’s Lloyds of London-insured ass.

  Rory lost sight of the hag for a moment and experienced a kidney-spear tackle, tossing him like a rag doll into a $2000 imported Chinese vase and its $1500 hand-carved stand.

  Rory jumped to his feet, grabbed Lenore, and threw her into the love seat. Lenore struck the couch with such force, it flipped backward and she ejected on the other side into a stunning, Japanese rice paper room divider valued at $750.

  “Well, Johnny, that’s one way to make origami…” Lena added as mock color commentary.

  Scrambling to her feet, Lenore shrieked and rushed at Rory in the direction of the kitchen. The matador backpedaled furiously, attempting a side step of the raging Spanish heifer. Not familiar with Lenore’s Olympic-ready, fencing-honed reflexes, Rory positioned himself perfectly for her to carom at a dead run, jumping onto and leaping from the base of the over-turned love seat. Flying through the air, Lenore shoulder-speared Rory backward into the kitchen pantry door. His 6’1” frame shattered the panel, broke several shelves, and released flour and sugar all over the floor.

  Lenore jumped back, legs braced for a retaliatory onslaught. Rory dusted himself off and lunged, throwing his shoulder into Lenore’s stomach, knocking her off her feet and tossing her over his shoulder in a single motion. Rory ran with Lenore into the bedroom, slammed her face down across the bed, and spanked her repeatedly, harder with each strike, eliciting another string of indecipherable obscenities from Spain’s contribution to the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling.

  After leaving numerous bright, red palm prints on Lenore’s tanned ass, Rory flipped her over. He pounced on her, grabbing her ankles and hooking her by the knees in his elbows, whereupon he launched his missile directly into her mound. In character, the banshee screamed and tore into the flesh of his back with her fingernails, settling with writhing under Rory's cunt-conquering torpedo and luxuriating in the fuck.

  They coupled for several mutually thrilling, fiery minutes, filled with a variety of shouts including variations of, “Fuck me! Fuck me you bastard!” and, “Oh yeah? You fucking hag?” until Lenore had her fill, unkindly bit Rory’s shoulder, and rolled away. Lenore jumped from the bed and raced for the living room, scrambling past Lena as the referee relaxed on one of the few unscathed pieces of furniture. Lena casually sipped Port from one of the unbroken glasses that survived the coffee table’s demise.

  “Rory chose wisely. Sandeman goes nicely with full-contact, mixed-martial-fucking.”

  Rory caught up with Lenore just as she ran into her first floor office. She stood firm near the bookcase, throwing legal journals at him, pretending to slow his advances.

  “Do not do it, Rory St. Cloud! Do not dare fuck me on my desk, you sick rapist!”

  Rory got the hint. “Oh, you don’t want your fucking desk messed up? Is that it?”

  “I am warning you, Rory St. Cloud! Do not fuck me on my desk or I will kill you! I swear I will kill you!”

  Rory lunged forward and arm-swept the contents of Lenore’s desk, showering the floor with legal papers, correspondence, and a no-longer-functioning, $400, multi-line desk phone. Lenore made an appropriately token attempt to dodge past Rory, running closely enough to let him wrap his arm aro
und her waist and pick her up, delivering her forthwith –– and gently — to the desktop.

  Rory placed Lenore on all fours on the elevated surface, pressing her face and tits firmly into the polished desktop. He climbed up and mounted the bitch from behind, hunching over her ass and humping her for a flaming, eight-minute-long mini-fuck.

  “Oh! Rory! Yes! Huh! Huh! Are you… Huh… enjoying… Huh... Fucking the two million… Huh… Hag… Huh… on her desk?”

  “Your pussy isn’t worth $2million dollars, hag! It’s worth more! I got your pussy at a discount…”

  When temporarily sated, Lenore lunged forward mid-stroke and rolled over. Rory bent to immobilize her. She sucker punched him in the chest, knocking the wind out of her aggressor. Lenore fell off the desk and ran from the office, racing around the living room, darting toward the stairs to the second floor.

  Lena licked chocolate from her fingers as Lenore approached the line judge’s perch. “Care for a little pick-me-up, Freaky?” she offered.

  Huffing and puffing and drenched in sweat, with Rory’s cum glazing her thighs, the super-attorney stopped and mopped her brow with the back of her hand, pushing her soaked hair out of her face. Lenore leered at Lena, grabbed the back of her roommate’s head, licked Lena's cheeks and neck, and then forced the Wild Child into an erotic, open-mouthed kiss. They licked furiously, then Lenore stepped back and stole two, large squares of melting chocolate from her lover’s hands. Lenore shoved the chocolate into her mouth, smeared it across her lips with the back of her hand, and scampered free just as Rory arrived.

  “Well, now!” Lena exclaimed. “Gotta try THAT again sometime!”

  Rory cut across the room, hurdled the couch, and snagged Lenore by the arm at the foot of the staircase.

  “Get down on your knees, hag! DO IT NOW!”

  “OR WHAT?”

  “Or I won’t make love to you for a WEEK!”

  “Ohhhhh… The billionaire thinks he can tell the supermodel HAG what to do, does he?”

  Rory grabbed Lenore’s shoulders and shoved her to her knees. “Suck my cock, hag!”

  “Ohhh… So the billionaire wants me to suck his cock! Is that it? The billionaire is so desperate he wants a HAG to suck his cock? How pathetic!”

  “Suck it, hag! Suck it now!”

  Lenore obeyed, smiling, staring into Rory’s eyes the entire time.

  It would cost plenty to repair in the morning, but from Lena’s vantage point it was a delightfully masturbatory fantasy. She came. Twice.

  His cock mildly satisfied, Rory picked Lenore up under the arms and tossed her into the air. She screamed, laughing like a child tossed by Daddy. On her way back down, Rory grabbed Lenore by the ass. She wrapped her legs around his waist and taunted.

  “And what are you going to do now, eh horny bastard? Do you still think you can handle THIS?”

  Rory carried Lenore over to the large leather chair and dumped her ass. Pinning her hands to the armrests, he called Lena over to help him spread Lenore’s legs and keep her target open.

  “Do you two think that raping me will help? Just try it! I will show you two who is a fucking hag! You will get yours Malena Sardi!”

  Lena stuck out her tongue and returned to her appointed seat on the sidelines. “Good luck, Freaky. I have St. Superman on my side.”

  Rory filled Lenore again, suggesting playtime should soon end. He coupled gently with Lenore, more sweetly than at any time during the battle royal. They joined with each other, grinding and wriggling. The experience wore out the she-devil and offered her the gentlest affirmation of her boyfriend’s burgeoning devotion.

  “Ohhh… Rory… Yes… Ohhh yes. Ohhh… Te amo, Rory. Te amo tanto, mi amor…”

  The sensation of Rory’s cock filling her, of their sweat blending, their bodies becoming one flesh on the night of their fated meeting, power washed Lenore’s filthy tongue. She moaned quietly, squirming seductively, pawing and scraping Rory’s back, digging into him with her nails. She grabbed at his ass to guide Rory and take him at her own pace.

  “Sí, mi amor… Lento y suave, Rory. Te quiero en mi coño…”

  When Lenore finally appeared more horny than harried, Rory finished off with fire, picking up speed to take Lenore to a muscle-jiggling climax. He flushed Lenore’s cunny with a second, smaller load of baby batter. He lingered, packaged snuggly in Lenore’s box, adoringly kissing her face and neck.

  Removing himself while the supermodel shook, Rory picked her up around the waist. He carried Lenore’s limp body to the couch and sat, draping her across his lap.

  “I might need a little help here, Lena. After all the destruction this tigress caused, I think this she needs a thorough spanking.”

  “I will show YOU who is a tigress, Rory St. Cloud!” growled the hag.

  “Glad to oblige,” Lena added.

  Lena grabbed Lenore’s arms and held them straight out past the end of the couch.

  “Ooooh! Fuck you, Lena Sardi! When I get my hands on you…! You bitch! I’ll…”

  “You’ll what? Hags can’t do anything to superheroes.”

  “AAAAAAHHHHHH LEEEEEENAAAAAA!”

  SPANK!

  “OUCH! Rory! Stop that!”

  SPANK! SPANK!

  “Rory St. Cloud! You stop!”

  SPANK, SPANK, SPANK, SPANK, GROPE!

  “OUCH! RORY!”

  “Yes, my beautiful, seductive, amazing future-wife?”

  Lena winked at Rory and released her grip, moving away to the big, comfy chair.

  “Rory…? Rory St. Cloud…? What did you just call me?”

  “Oh, you mean...” Rory turned Lenore over, pulled her up to a seated position on his naked lap, penis erect between her clenched legs. He fixed on her eyes. “…beautiful, seductive, amazing…?”

  Lenore smiled. “No… I think I heard that part clearly. At least it was not,” Lenore grimaced, “‘hag.’ I mean the other part.”

  “Ohhhh… You mean, ‘Yes, my…’”

  “RORY ST. CLOUD!”

  “Ohhhh! You mean, ‘future-wife’?”

  Lena relaxed in the large, overstuffed leather chair. With her legs spread and dangling seductively over the arms, massaging her puss with one hand, Lena consumed the last few, un-crushed bars of dark chocolate. “Oh brother,” she groaned, rolling her eyes. “Here come the tears.”

  “Yes! Rory! That part! Do you really love me that much, Rory?”

  “Lenore, dear, I thought we got well past that part before the sucking, fucking, crying, fighting, breaking furniture part?”

  Lenore laughed and rested her head against Rory’s chest. “But Rory… Can you really love someone who is as big a mess as I?”

  “Lenore, you have no idea how much of a mess you’d be marrying.”

  Lena interjected from the line judge’s perch. “And somehow, I think the two of you are messed up enough for all of us. So Auntie Lena will just sit on the sidelines and provide the comic relief from time to time, okay?”

  Lena threw her hands into the air in, “Hold the presses!” fashion. “Oh yeah…! And let’s not forget about that whole, ‘fucking my girlfriend’ agreement, okay? I’ll be happy to provide you two with active marriage therapy whenever you need it.”

  Lenore patted the couch. “LENA, you vixen! Get over here!”

  The tennis-happy trixie bounded from her chair, bounced onto the sofa, and snuggled up next to Rory. He pulled the girls close. Lena and Lenore nestled their heads on Rory’s chest and he sighed, all battles finally resolved. Wrapping her index finger and thumb around the head of his relaxing, dribbling cock, Lena pumped it for no particular reason at all.

  “Well, lovers…” Lena added. “There’s one teeny weeny problem with everything that happened here tonight and it’s not the fact that we just created the second most illegal relationship in the entire state of New York OR the $15,000 worth of damage you two did.”

  Lenore and Rory scanned around the room, taking in the aftereffects of all thei
r crashes, bashes, thrashes, and splashes. “Oh my God…” Lenore whispered.

  “Well, if it’s not the damage, then what’s the problem?” asked Rory.

  Lena looked at them childlike, tilting her head upward and batting her eyelashes. “’Auntie Lena… Now tell us again how mommy and daddy met and fell in love…?'”

  SPANK!

  Twenty Five

  February 25, 1988

  Dear Diary,

  I am in love! I have found The One! Rory St. Cloud is the most amazing, loving man in the world and he is MINE!

  I cannot believe this is happening to me! It is like a fairy tale! For so many years I have wanted nobody but the Wild Child, yet fate put Rory and I together last night at the Rising Stars benefit. I felt like a fairy tale princess the whole night long!

  But my blessing is doubled! Rory has agreed to love Lena, too! I will not lose my beautiful Wild Child! Oh, I am so excited! I cannot stop smiling!

  I laid between my beautiful Wild Child and my handsome Rory the whole night through. At times I awoke and felt their arms and legs surrounding me, protecting me. As I awoke this morning, Lena whispered into my ear. “When you pick ‘em, Freaky, you really pick ‘em.”

  But that is my blessing! I did not “pick” Rory! Fate put us together!

  What did I do in my evil life to be given the gift of such giving lovers? With all of the evil I have done to Lena, what did I do to deserve this blessing? I do not deserve Rory. I do not deserve Lena. Yet now I have both!

  From the first moment I looked into Rory’s eyes, I knew we were fated. Rory was so despondent, yet when he looked at me I watched his sadness fly away! For once, the curse of my beauty brought a broken heart comfort. But it was not my beauty alone that Rory saw. For the first time in my life I felt as if a man looked beyond my flesh to peer inside my heart. When Rory looked into my eyes, I felt the same sensations I feel with Lena. He sees beyond my facade and is unafraid to journey into the abyss of my blackened spirit. For reasons I cannot understand, Rory seems to love the rotting corpse living within my tempting flesh.